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OK. Anybody fancy a Belgian experimental compilation album, consisting entirely of appalling versions of the Blue Danube Waltz? No, I thought not.

If you change your mind, it's at WFMU's Beware of the Blog. I particularly like the Disrythmic Etude, if only for the mental image of what happens when a ballroom-full of people try to dance to it. Runner-up is the Michael Nyman version, which lasts for twelve sodding minutes, and in which the pianist sounds as though he's trying to save his fingers by playing the piano with his elbows.

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